One of my clients had gone through a rollercoaster ride of her emotions in recent promotional opportunity at work. At the beginning, she held very high expectation on her application for the promotion. She even spent long hours for writing a proposal for presenting in the job interview. She told me that there are signs …
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It is common that we tend to expell the part of ourselves that we found unacceptable onto others
A professional client of mine described an incident in which his client showed mistrust on his scheduling and thought he manipulated her. He actually was a very honest and trustworthy professional and a very competent practitioner. He felt very upset about a minority of clients mistrusting him. He told me that nearly all of his …
It is important to combine assertiveness with compassion in managing relationhship issues
It is common for all of us to think in a dichotomous term that either we should be assertive and focus on setting our boundaries with others or we should be compassionate of the sufferings of others and be more accommodating. Is it possible for us to be both compassionate and assertive? A client of …
It is important for us to strike a balance between our subjectivity and objectivity
All of us may have experiences of realizing that our judgment on others basing on limited information may usually be different from the reality. For instance, a customer service staff subjectively thought that a client who presented himself as very polite and respectful on the phone was a very nice person with good intention. She …
It is necessary for us to embrace our vulnerabilities for grounding ourselves
In my clinical practice, it is common for perfectionists to seek help from me due to various reasons. For instance, a lady could not accept herself making mistakes at work and engage in repetitive checking before sending out emails to colleagues. Due to her perfectionism, she also had severe problem in procrastination. As a result, …
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Our identity is still emerging in middle adulthood
It is beyond dispute that emerging adulthood is a stage for young adults to explore and create possibilities in ones’ life. It is common for us to see that the identity of this group of adults is still emerging. How about people in the middle adulthood? Those around 40/45 to 60/65 years old are also …
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