The circular trap of life as meaningless when we downplay our thoughts

I was questioned by my client one day that if we accept our thoughts as it is but not as facts, there seems to be no meaning in our lives anymore.  His argument is based on the discussion of him having a thought, “I need to stay in the present moment and not worrying about …

How to be more mindful when we relate with someone with narcissistic personality traits?

When we encounter someone with narcissistic personality traits in our social circle or in our family, it is difficult for us not to be trapped by their tactics of feeding their own narcissism hunger by boosting and bullying others in order to control.  For instance, a client of mine tended to mindlessly satisfy the narcissistic …

Are you a people-pleaser? How to set boundaries and be more authentic in connection with others?

A client of mine had an enmeshed relationship with her narcissistic father, whom she needed to please and meet his unrealistic standard throughout her childhood.  Her tendency to please her father was related to survival in the family in her childhood, as well as a way to seek approval and love from him.  However, deep …

How to cope with midlife crisis?

Due to medical advancement, the lifespan of human has been increased.  Middle adulthood is redefined and people around age 40 to 65 are at middle age.  In this stage of life, ones’ children attain adulthood and ones may also become grandparents.  People started to realize their lives are limited and started to think what to …

Why some people think they are losers when making a mistake and other people do not?

One of my clients tended to think he was a loser whenever he made a mistake at work or in interpersonal relationships.  One day, he came to me and told me, “I shouldn’t let my colleague know my lack of motivation at work due to demoralization within the team.  I am so stupid.  I am …

Creativity may be one of the ways to cope with our bereavement

One of my clients had gone through bereavement for her husband’s sudden death.  She was overwhelmed by her loss and seemed to be very depressed for a long time during the grief process.  In fact, she lost her father at young age due to his terminal illness.  Losing a parental figure at her young age …