It is important to combine assertiveness with compassion in managing relationhship issues

It is common for all of us to think in a dichotomous term that either we should be assertive and focus on setting our boundaries with others or we should be compassionate of the sufferings of others and be more accommodating.  Is it possible for us to be both compassionate and assertive?  A client of …

It is important for us to strike a balance between our subjectivity and objectivity

All of us may have experiences of realizing that our judgment on others basing on limited information may usually be different from the reality.  For instance, a customer service staff subjectively thought that a client who presented himself as very polite and respectful on the phone was a very nice person with good intention.  She …

It is necessary for us to embrace our vulnerabilities for grounding ourselves

In my clinical practice, it is common for perfectionists to seek help from me due to various reasons. For instance, a lady could not accept herself making mistakes at work and engage in repetitive checking before sending out emails to colleagues. Due to her perfectionism, she also had severe problem in procrastination. As a result, …

Our identity is still emerging in middle adulthood

It is beyond dispute that emerging adulthood is a stage for young adults to explore and create possibilities in ones’ life.  It is common for us to see that the identity of this group of adults is still emerging.  How about people in the middle adulthood?  Those around 40/45 to 60/65 years old are also …

Our mind is webbed, that is why we are so caught up sometimes

Whenever I suggested my clients to practice mindfulness in every day life, they sometimes told me that it is very difficult for them to stay focus to be mindful to their present.  They are usually easily being caught up with their busy mind.  For instance, a lady who had gone through grief for the passing …

What is dissociation? Is dissociative experience rare?

Have you ever got lost in a movie and are absorbed by it?  You may not realise the persons sitting next to you in the cinema are crying or using their mobile phones.  Have you ever felt numb immediately after being told some sad news, such as the passing of a loved ones?  Have you …